It takes two baby

Last night I was treated to the following view for approximately 23 minutes and 36 seconds. 

But what is it viewers?

I am sure you are now trying to work out what it is. Or have clicked elsewhere in your browser having realised this is weird.

I'll help you out but bear in mind this is something that has been burnt on to my retinas over the past 24 hours.

If you have not worked it out, it is Steve Robinson.

More accurately, it is Steve Robinson's backside as viewed from about three inches away.

I like Steve a lot, he has been a friend for approximately 15 years. We have raced together for most of that period and we share a common love of Stewart Lee's comedy. He also has a van akin to Team Sky's Death Star. What's not to like?

But to spend half an hour that far from where his lunch would normally be exiting his body, takes some doing. And also some convincing, let's get that straight right now.

So, apart from a pastime performed in the Cannock Chase area by ex-professional footballers, what could we be up to? Well 'give me your answer do', if it wasn't whizzing along on a racing tandem.

Riding a 'normal' time trial bike at speed is exhilarating. Riding a 2-man version with no control over the front/pointy end but still attempting to make it go quicker is probably the comparable to static-line parachuting from 800ft, versus jumping off a Red-Bull-branded-space-balloon thingy in a flying-bat suit.

Tandem racing, it is the future. I have seen it, I have scoffed at it, my prejudice for the tandem was rivaled only by that of my disdain for the folding bike (and all forms of trikes).

But that was yesterday, before my road to Damascus (or Old Warden, Bedfordshire) moment.

My only lingering thought, apart from the visual scar (above) is that the words of the song 'Daisy, Daisy' and associated reference to a bicycle made for two, need to be struck from the canon of English language popular verse. Or at least it should be annotated along the lines of the following.

Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer, do,

(Translates to 'So long as the answer is not 'Slow-the-f**k-down!! We're going to die on that corner!')

I'm half crazy all for the love of you.

(Half-crazy? And the rest. Especially if you think we are going to smash 350 Watts up that hill.) 

It won't be a stylish marriage,

(Easy for you to say, you are not stoking this thing - I left my dignity and any residual style at the signing on point along with my £2 levy to the CTT.) 

I can't afford a carriage,

(Because you blew it all on carbon fibre, tandem specific wheels and modified Sugino hubs.)

But you'd look sweet upon the seat

(Sweet? Sweaty more like.)

Of a bicycle made for two

(Well, that is factually correct - so leave that line in)

I think HAL in '2001- A Space Odyssey' sang about this. Just before he fired his best mate out of the air-lock or similar. 

For the record, Steve (pilot) and I went round the Hitchin Nomads Briercliffe 10 course, which is not flat, in well over 25mph. That is half a minute quicker than I have ever gone on my own. Still grinning, although seeking therapy.