'tis the season to be merry (but not too merry)

So, two months in to the return to something like "serious" cycling what have I learnt. Well firstly, that old habits die hard. For you amusement and as a reminder to myself for what I suspect are going to be periods of intensive suffering here are the highlights.

1. Drinking 8 pints of beer, a few glasses of red ink and having Chicken Tikka Womble (or whatever it was supposed to be) the night before a two hour early morning "tempo" session is a catastrophic idea.

2. No matter how hard I try I still get drawn to Cycling Weekly and usually end up wasting hours of my life wondering if I can really justify a new set of ultra light-weight tat.

But what happened to the old Parker's adverts and all that detail? Damn the Internet. Those adverts were the best bit.

3. Like a Jack Russell attacking the postie, when I see a set of "30 signs" I have a nervous twitch that propels me up to high speed and then produces a spectacular "bonk" about twenty seconds later.

Where's the postie? Grrrr....grrr.....

4. The percentage chance of getting all members of a club to turn up for training runs in similar (if not identical) kit is 0.0000000000001%.

5. There's always someone faster, better, more graceful on the bike in any bunch ride.

6. There's still nothing like the taste of Nutella on toast and a mug of tea after a ride.

7. The roads of Bedforshire are poorly surfaced and the drag down the A600 from Stondon is something I still hate with a passion.

8. Mike Webb is the funniest cyclist in Britain although he probably doesn't realise it (still).

9. Christmas is a time to get some sneaky miles in so that you can feel a bit smug and get one over your prospective competitors.

10. Turbo trainers are no substitue for any of the above.

Err... that's all for now folks.

Have a great Christmas!